Mai “Neta” banna chahta hu...

Finally I discovered the sole reason for which I chose to do MBA- Placements. Being in the final year, and on the peak season of getting a ‘naukri’, which will determine my status Quo, everyone starts taking things seriously. So, I am no exception. Herd Mentality.
The company, package, profile, and every such syndrome starts showing up when you are in the final year. Also, it’s a mixed feeling when any of your friends get placed with a good package. As said by Farhan (Madhvan) in 3 Idiots, “When your best friend fails, you feel bad. But when he comes first, you feel more bad.” So you are under pressure to grab whatever opportunity comes in your way. It is a tough job to get a job, but come on; I don’t wanna be left out.
Everyone thinks that he/she can hit the bulls eye in one go. Getting a pay package of 10-15 lakhs per annum is a piece of cake. But people break their teeth while trying to get a bite and that is when they become aware that the cake is made up of Rock and you need metal teeth to get the taste of it. So the ground reality is you wont get fat package it you are a fresher. There are always some compromises one has to make in life. Here, it is either to take a job that offers you a decent package but not the work you are interested in or slog with less money (sometimes it gives you the feeling that you are working for free) in the area of your interest.
But I had a problem. Neither of the choices would suffice my requirement. Good package in the field I wanted to work was not possible as I being a fresher; also I did not want to take any other job. But as it is said (I am not sure who said it) that ‘Money can make you forget anything, and can lure you towards anything’, so I was much smitten by it. No one on the Globe would have ever thought of doing this after an MBA, except if he/she has chosen ‘Political Science’ or ‘Economics’ as their subjects. So, I had decided that I want to become a ‘neta’.
Friends thought that I have gone crazy; my parents also took me to a psychiatrist for a check-up. But after constant hammering by everyone, I finally confessed why I made such a stupid decision. Being an MP has certain benefits:
• The basic pay you get is Rs. 50,000 per month
• Office expenses at around Rs.40,000 per month
• Constituency allowance Rs.40,000 pm
• Interest-free loans for buying cars Rs.4L per month
• Road mileage rate for vehicles used Rs.16/km
• Your spouse can travel any number of times in first class in railways
• Pension Rs.20,000 pm
Additional Perks:
• 1,50,000 free phone calls a year on 3 landlines and 2 mobiles
• Rent free housing; govt pays rent on furniture upto Rs.60,000 and Rs.1500 for additional items
• 50,000 units of electricity every year
• 400 kilo litres of water
Eligibility Criteria:
• Atleast 10th pass (or even fail will do)
• There should be some complaints filed against you
• You should have atleast once been to the jail
• You should have good marketing and communication skills (needed to promote yourself at the elections)
• You should be aggressive enough to prove your point, even if you are wrong
• You should be expert in throwing shoes...your aim should be perfect
Thus, I am still trying to convince my parents to allow me to become a neta, as this is one of the rare professions where there can be a 200% hike in your salary in one can still ask for more increment...I still have my fingers crossed...